Happiness is having the right level of expectation.

Just got back from lunch. My usual lunch buddy is up at Dreamworld today, so I had to sandwich on my lonesome. When you work in a 5 person office, lunch is a welcome social reprieve from this quiet little cubicle culture. So I headed down to St. Leonards Forum just to be surrounded by people, but ended up staring at pigeons sunbathing in the fountain. Man they have it good - splashing about, clucking at each other, surrounded by food dropped by careless humans. No lawsuits, 9-5 or moral dilemmas - just casual sex, gluttony, and swimming. Fantastic. You know your life is in a rut when you start to envy the pigeons.

Rats with wings. Beats being a rat.

Booyakasha! What a weekend. Had a nice picnic at Clontarf, went swimming in my boxers, clubbing til 5am, sped out to Berowra for Counterstrike, finally collapsed at 9pm Sunday and woke up on Groundhog day! Goddamn Monday. Curse you to hell!

Thanks to Danger for making my weekend and ruining my week. Ya Bastard! How am I going to get thru the next 5 days?! I feel like an old lady with a cold turkey. Or an ancient mariner with a dead albatross. Not to mention my throwing arm is fucked now... and I have to carry this 10kg laptop home tonight!

Arrrrr mateys, where's the free seafood?

This is a good time to re-evaluate your goals, especially with regard to your material wealth. You have a tendency to confuse money with happiness. Make a list of things that bring you joy that don't cost lots of cash. Then get into the habit of enjoying these activities on a regular basis. You'll be amazed how your perspective changes as a result.

Ah sweet horoscope, you know me too well! I have been burning through the cash as late. Beer, meals and movies. Oh and petrol... lots of petrol. Been driving all over the place lately, flatpedalling the Accord as if it were a WRX. It's strange how speed can be calming. I hurtle through the landscape oblivious to the potential death whirling at me out of the darkness. Even when I am aware that I am taking a corner too fast, I don't slow down. I just lean further to the other side. My life is getting increasingly surreal. I'm taking excessive risks on the market. I've started blogging at work. As if, nothing will change. As if I were impervious. I wonder if my perspective is changing, or if I subconsciously want to lose my job and force a change in my life?

Okay player... back to the land of the sober. Dreamt that a good friend of mine was killed last night. I just couldn't come to terms with it. I thought I'd rather have 50 people I don't know, die, than one I do know. Is that wrong? Not according to Black Hawk Down or Spy Game. Woke up in a foul mood. Dressed in the same clothes as yesterday, wolfed four weetbixes and trudged off to work.

Haven't been updating much since G got back. It's too easy being lazy. Watching movies and eating junk food each night is tiring me out! But at least I'm harvesting ideas for my next film. Pictures, feelings, memories. Cut and dried. Then press-ganged into my little black book. My little army of words. My Precioussss.... My mum used to collect dried flowers that way. Pansies crushed between the pages of big hoary scrapbooks. Damn it's all dust now. Hopefully these ideas will stick around long enough to coagulate... Like treacle... copper-sulphate... Cheese-cake!

God I hate Mondays.

Ah, happy days. My stock-trading activities officially broke even this week. From the shameful depths of 3 iBooks down, to back-in-black! In fact I'm even up by one iBook now. The Jedi mind-tricks must be working. If only Ansett would collapse every week. Anyway I should write more, but I think I better wait til I've calmed down. Boasting irritates my lungs. Cheers.